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      學(xué)習(xí)啦 > 學(xué)習(xí)英語(yǔ) > 英語(yǔ)閱讀 > 英語(yǔ)笑話 > 最經(jīng)典的短英文笑話閱讀

      最經(jīng)典的短英文笑話閱讀

      時(shí)間: 韋彥867 分享

      最經(jīng)典的短英文笑話閱讀

        笑話一般比較短小,喜劇性很強(qiáng),普遍存在于人們的日常生活中。笑話的娛樂(lè)作用可以減輕人的心理壓力,促進(jìn)身體健康。學(xué)習(xí)啦小編分享最經(jīng)典的短英文笑話,希望可以幫助大家!

        最經(jīng)典的短英文笑話:And Stuff the Cuffs in Your Boots

        把褲腳塞到你的靴子里面去

        The untried general faced battle the next day, and was more than a little frightened.

        一位未曾有過(guò)作戰(zhàn)經(jīng)驗(yàn)的將軍非?;炭郑?yàn)榈诙鞂⒂袀€(gè)戰(zhàn)役要面對(duì)。

        Seeking inspiration, he looked into the history of great commanders and learned that Wellington had always dressed in red for battle,

        為了尋找靈感,他翻查了歷年來(lái)偉大將領(lǐng)的檔案,發(fā)現(xiàn)威靈頓將軍每次戰(zhàn)斗中都身穿紅色衣服,

        so that his men would not realize if he were shot.

        萬(wàn)一他被射傷的話,他的士兵也不會(huì)發(fā)現(xiàn)。

        Instantly he called in his adjutant and ordered a pair of trousers in a rich, dark brown.

        于是他傳了副官進(jìn)來(lái)并指示手下做了一條深褐色的褲子。

        最經(jīng)典的短英文笑話Keep Your Head

        頭腦要保持冷靜!

        A young man was working in the produce section of a grocery store when a customer askedhim for half a head of cabbage.

        有一個(gè)年輕人在一家雜貨店的農(nóng)產(chǎn)部門(mén)工作,一天一位顧客要向他買(mǎi)半顆包心菜。

        "Sir, we don't sell half heads of anything. "

        “先生,我們東西都沒(méi)有賣(mài)半顆的。”

        "Well, I insist, I 0nly want half a head. "

        “哎呀,我就買(mǎi)半顆,我只要半顆。”

        "I'll ask the manager. "

        “我要問(wèn)問(wèn)經(jīng)理才行。”

        The young man walked to the manager's office and, not realizing that the customer hadfollowed him, said to the manager,

        那名年輕人走到經(jīng)理的辦公室,不知道那位顧客尾隨著他,他對(duì)經(jīng)理說(shuō)道:

        "Sir, some asshole wants to buy just half a head of cabbage. "

        “經(jīng)理,有個(gè)渾蛋只要買(mǎi)半顆包心菜。”

        Turning and noticing the customer, he quickly added,

        他轉(zhuǎn)身發(fā)現(xiàn)那名顧客,立刻又補(bǔ)充說(shuō):

        "And this gentleman wants the other half. "

        “而這位先生要買(mǎi)另一半。”

        Later, the manager took the young man aside and said,

        稍后,經(jīng)理把他拉到一旁說(shuō)道:

        "That was quick thinking, young fellow. We can use bright lads like you. If I hear of a higherposition opening up, I'll keep you in mind. "

        “年輕人,你反應(yīng)真快。我們需要像你這么聰明的人,如果有較高的職位空缺,我會(huì)記得你的。”

        Sure enough, a few weeks later the manager told the young man that an assistant manager'sspot had become vacant in the company's store in Edmonton.

        幾個(gè)星期之后,經(jīng)理告訴那名年輕人在艾得蒙敦分店有個(gè)經(jīng)理的職位空缺。

        "Edmonton!" blurted out the young man. "Why, there's nothing in Edmonton but hookers andhockey, event hockey players,

        “艾得蒙敦!”年輕人叫了出來(lái),“那兒有的只是妓女和曲棍球選手而已。”

        "Young man , my wife happens to come from Edmonton! "

        “年輕人,我太太剛好來(lái)自艾得蒙敦!”

        "No kidding, sir? what posltion does she play?"

        “真的嗎?經(jīng)理,那她是打哪一個(gè)位置呢?”

        最經(jīng)典的短英文笑話:Home Sweet Home

        還是家里好

        A surgeon returned from a safari in Africa.

        一位外科醫(yī)生剛從非洲狩獵回來(lái)。

        "How did it go?" asked his colleagues.

        “這次打獵順利嗎?”同僚問(wèn)道。

        "Oh , it was very disappointing," replied the surgeon.

        “喔,實(shí)在太令人失望了,”外科醫(yī)生答道。

        "I didn't kill a thing. In fact, I'd have been better off staying here in the hospital. "

        “我什么也沒(méi)獵殺到,實(shí)際上,還是待在醫(yī)院里比較有成就感。”

        
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