幽默英文小笑話
幽默英文小笑話
“哪里有人,哪里就有笑聲。”從古到今,笑話是人們生活中不可缺少的“調(diào)劑品”。笑話使人們?cè)诳贪宓纳钪懈械揭唤z快意和放松，在人們的日常生活中起著重要調(diào)劑作用。下面學(xué)習(xí)啦小編為大家?guī)?lái)幽默英文小笑話，歡迎大家閱讀!
幽默英文小笑話1：
A fourth-grade teacher was giving her pupils a lesson on logic.
"Here is the situation," she said. "a man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river,
fishing. He loses his balance, falls in, and begins splashing and yellin
g for help. His wife hears the commotion, knows that he can't swim, and runs down to the
bank. Why do you think she ran to the bank?"
A girl raised her hand and asked, "to draw out all of his savings?"
小學(xué)四年級(jí)的教師正在給學(xué)生們上一堂邏輯課。她舉了這么一個(gè)例子：“有這樣一種情
況，一個(gè)男人在河中心的船上釣魚(yú)，突然失去重心掉進(jìn)了水里。于是他開(kāi)始掙扎并喊救命。
他的妻子聽(tīng)到了他的喊聲，知道他并不會(huì)游泳，所以她就急忙跑向河岸。誰(shuí)能告訴我這是為
什么?” 一個(gè)女生舉手答道，“是不是去取他的存款?”
幽默英文小笑話2：
"Doctor," she said loudly, bouncing into the room, "I want you to say frankly what's
wrong with me."
He surveyed her from head to foot. "Madam," he said at length, "I've just three things
to tell you. First, your weight wants reducing by nearly fifty pounds. Second, your beauty
could be improved if you used about one tenth as much rouge and lipstick. And third, I'm
an artist---the doctor lives downstairs."
“醫(yī)生”她沖進(jìn)屋后大聲說(shuō)道。
“我想讓你坦率地說(shuō)我到底得了什么病。”
他從頭到腳打量打量她，然后大聲說(shuō)：“太太，我有三件事要對(duì)你說(shuō)。第一，您的體重需要減少大約 50 磅;第二，如果您要用上十分之一的胭脂和口紅，您的美貌將會(huì)改變。第三，我是一位畫(huà)家——醫(yī)生住在樓下。”
幽默英文小笑話3：
One evening I drove my husband's car to the shopping mall.
On my return, I noticed that how dusty the outside of his car was and cleaned it up a
bit.When I finally entered the house, I called out."The woman who loves you the
most in the world just cleaned your headlights and windshield."
My husband looked up and said, "Mom's here?"
一天晚上我開(kāi)著丈夫的車(chē)去購(gòu)物，
回來(lái)后發(fā)現(xiàn)車(chē)身沾滿灰塵，于是擦洗了一陣。當(dāng)我終于走進(jìn)屋里時(shí)大聲喊：“世界上最
愛(ài)你的女人剛擦洗了你的車(chē)燈和擋風(fēng)玻璃。”
我丈夫抬頭看了看，說(shuō)：“媽媽來(lái)了?”
幽默英文小笑話4：
A bit of advice for those about to retire. If you are only 65, never move to a retirement
community. Everybody else is n their 70s, 80s, or 90s. So when something has to be
moved, lifted or loaded, they yell,"Get the kid."
這里想對(duì)將要退休者提一點(diǎn)忠告。如果你只有 65 歲的話，
千萬(wàn)別進(jìn)退休社區(qū)。因?yàn)槟抢锶巳硕计甙耸畾q或者八九十歲了。每當(dāng)要搬東西，抬東西
或者裝東西時(shí)，他們就叫喊，“讓小的干吧。”
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