一篇英文笑話(huà)
笑話(huà)由于其滑稽可笑的特點(diǎn)而為人們長(zhǎng)久以來(lái)所喜愛(ài)。而人們對(duì)笑話(huà)的熱衷與喜愛(ài)也促使人們?cè)陂_(kāi)懷捧腹的同時(shí)對(duì)笑話(huà)為何能夠使人發(fā)笑這一問(wèn)題進(jìn)行思考。下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編帶來(lái)的經(jīng)典英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)，歡迎閱讀!
經(jīng)典英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)篇一
True Dedication! 好投入啊!
Mrs. Fortesque was getting more and more worried.
福特斯克太太越來(lái)越擔(dān)心。
Her husband had left for a round of golf early in the morning and by mid-afternoon he still wasn't home.
因?yàn)樗壬辉绯鋈ゴ?a href='http://lpo831.com/yundong/gaoerfuqiu/' target='_blank'>高爾夫球，到下午三四點(diǎn)都還沒(méi)回家。
Evening came and Mr.Fortesque still hadn't returned.
甚至到傍晚也還不見(jiàn)人影。
The lady was just about to call the police when she heard her husband's car pulling into the drive way.
福特斯克太太正要打電話(huà)報(bào)警就聽(tīng)到她先生開(kāi)車(chē)回來(lái)了。
Rushing outside, she told her husband, "Darling, I was so worried about you. What kept you?"
她沖出門(mén)外，向她先生說(shuō)道："親愛(ài)的，我一整天都在擔(dān)心你，是什么事把你耽擱了?"
"Charlie had a heart attack on the fourth hole."
“查理在第四洞時(shí)心臟病發(fā)作。”
"Oh, my goodness, that's terrible!"
“喔，天哪，真可怕!”
"You're telling me! All day long it was shoot the ball, drag Charlie, shoot the ball, drag Charlie . . . . "
“那還用你說(shuō)嗎!一整天我都一邊打球，一邊拉查理，一會(huì)兒打球，一會(huì)兒拖查理，……
經(jīng)典英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)篇二
老年是人生的第二個(gè)童年期嗎?
An old man sees a little boy sitting on a curb, crying.
一位老人看見(jiàn)一個(gè)小男孩坐在路旁號(hào)啕大哭。
"What's the matter, little boy?" he asks.
“怎么回事，小兄弟?”老人問(wèn)道。
"I can't do what the big boys do. "
“大男孩能做的事，我都不能做。”
The old man sits down next to him and starts crying too.
聽(tīng)了他的話(huà)，老人坐在小男孩旁邊也開(kāi)始哭了起來(lái)。
經(jīng)典英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)篇三
特別來(lái)賓
A lawyer finds himself at the Pearly Gates at the same time as the pope.
一位律師發(fā)現(xiàn)他和某教宗一起到達(dá)天堂的珍珠門(mén)。
Both men are allowed to enter heaven.
兩個(gè)人都被允許進(jìn)入天堂。
and the lawyer is ensconced in a magnificent mansion.
律師被安置在一間豪華的別墅，
But he sees that the pope is housed in a far more humble dwelling.
但他卻見(jiàn)到教宗被安排住在非常簡(jiǎn)陋的住所。
Unable to restrain his curiosity,the lawyer asks St.Peter about it.
由于好奇心的驅(qū)使，律師問(wèn)圣彼得其中原委。
“Well, you see,” replies St. Peter, "we have dozens of popes up here, but we-ve never had alawyer before. "
“哦，你看我們這里有好幾十位教宗，可是你卻是第一個(gè)上天堂的律師呢!”圣彼得答道。
經(jīng)典英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)篇四
Talk about Luck
好運(yùn)跟著保險(xiǎn)來(lái)
"For the last time, I don't want any insurance ! " said the harassed householder to thesalesman
“這是最后一次了，我不要買(mǎi)任何保險(xiǎn)!”被騷擾的房主對(duì)推銷(xiāo)員說(shuō)道。
"Just a moment, sir. Please consider this :Just last month I sold a policy to a man much likeyourself.
“等一會(huì)兒，先生，請(qǐng)您仔細(xì)考慮一下：上個(gè)月有一位先生長(zhǎng)得跟你很像，他剛買(mǎi)了一份保險(xiǎn)，
The very next day his house caught fire. The house was completely gutted.
隔天他家就著火，房子內(nèi)部全都被燒毀，
To save himself, he had to leap from an upstairs window; he landed on his own car, wentthrough the roof, broke both his legs and an arm.
為了保住性命，他從樓上窗戶(hù)跳下來(lái)，恰巧落在他的汽車(chē)上，穿過(guò)車(chē)頂，他摔斷了兩條腿和一只手臂。”
""Well, he was one of the lucky ones, wasn't he?"
“喔!他就是你所說(shuō)的幸運(yùn)人士中的一個(gè)，不是嗎?
經(jīng)典英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)篇五
Thanks a Lot Sarge
多謝了，班長(zhǎng)
The sergeant had just completed the morning inspection of the troops.
一位班長(zhǎng)剛完成部隊(duì)晨間檢查。
"Before I dismiss you, there's just one announcement. Private Kowalski, your mother is dead.Dismissed."
“解散之前，有件事要宣布一下，二等兵卡瓦斯基，你母親已經(jīng)過(guò)世了。解散!”
The soldier was devastated, of course, and the lieutenant was appalled at the sergeant'sheartlessness.
當(dāng)然，那位士兵遭受很大的打擊，而排長(zhǎng)也訝異于班長(zhǎng)的冷酷無(wú)情。
"For Heaven' s sake, sergeant, next time you have to inform a trooper of a loved one' sdemise,please be a little more subtle," he said.
“看在老天的份分上，班長(zhǎng)，下次你要告訴弟兄們有親人死亡時(shí)，請(qǐng)多用點(diǎn)技巧，委婉一些，”排長(zhǎng)說(shuō)道。
A few weeks later, sorry to say, the sergeant had another opportunity.
幾個(gè)禮拜之后，很不幸那位班長(zhǎng)又有一次機(jī)會(huì)。
Lining up his troops, he ordered, "All of you whose mother is still alive, step forward. Not you,Johnson."
集合了部隊(duì)，他下口令道：“所有媽媽尚健在的，前進(jìn)一步。你，約翰遜，除外。”
看了“經(jīng)典英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)”的人還看了：