關于幽默簡短英語笑話欣賞
笑話作為一種城市化的民間口頭創(chuàng)作體裁,是一種重要的交際手段。在社會文化中,笑話一直都具有無法替代的特殊意義。本文是關于幽默簡短英語笑話,希望對大家有幫助!
關于幽默簡短英語笑話: Halloween Party
A man with a bald head and a wooden leg is invited to a fancy dress party. He doesn't know what costume to wear to hide his head and his leg, so he writes to a fancy dress company to explain his problem.
A few days later he receives a parcel with a note: "Dear Sir, Please find enclosed a pirate'soutfit. The spotted handkerchief will cover your bald head and with your wooden leg you will be just right as a pirate."
The man thinks this is terrible because they have just emphasised his wooden leg, so he writes a letter of complaint.
A week passes and he receives another parcel and note: "Dear Sir, Sorry about the previous parcel. Please find enclosed a monk's habit. The long robe will cover your wooden leg and with your bald head you will really look the part."
The man is really furious now, because the company has gone from emphasising his wooden leg to drawing attention to his bald head. So he writes a really rude letter of complaint.
A few days later he gets a very small parcel from the company with an accompanying letter: "Dear Sir, Please find enclosed a tin of Golden Syrup. Pour the tin of Golden Syrup over your head, stick your wooden leg up your ass - go as a toffee apple."
關于幽默簡短英語笑話:I've Killed The Easter Bunny!
A man was driving down a road, when all of a sudden, the Easter Bunny ran out into the road and the man hit it.The man got out of his car and started crying, for he had killed the Easter Bunny. "Oh no!" cried the man, "I have killed the Easter Bunny! Now no one will be able to get easter eggs on Easter!! And it's all my fault!" Just then, a lady drove down the road, and she noticed the man crying next to his car, so she stopped and got out to see what the problem was.She walked over and asked, "What's the matter?" and the man said,"I've killed the Easter bunny and there will be no Easter because of me!" She said,"Don't worry!" and she ran back to her car. She came back with a can of spray in her hand. She sprayed the bunny, and the bunny leaped up and started to run. Then he stopped and turned around and waved. Then he started to run again, then he stopped, and waved again. Then he stopped, turned around, and waved again. This happened about ten times.Puzzled, the man asked, "What's in the can?" She said, "It's hairspray. It livens up hare and adds permanent wave."
關于幽默簡短英語笑話:Einstein And God
Einstein climbs to the top of Mt. Sinai to get close enough to talk to God.Looking up, he asks the Lord..."God, what does a million years mean to you?"The Lord replies, "A minute.""Einstein asks, "And what does a million dollars mean to you?"The Lord replies, "A penny."Einstein asks, "Can I have a penny?"The Lord replies, "In a minute."
關于幽默簡短英語笑話: Death Row
A lawyer walks into his client's death row cell and says, "I've got good news, and bad news for you." The prisoner says, "Okay, what's the bad news ?" "The bad news is that the Governor won't issue a stay of your execution!" "Oh that's terrible. What possibly could be the good news?" "The good news is that I got Your Voltage Reduced!"
關于幽默簡短英語笑話:Mr. Bear And Mr. Rabbit
Mr. Bear and Mr. Rabbit lived in the same forest, but they didn't like each other very much. One day, while walking through the woods, and they came across a golden frog. They were amazed when the frog talked to them. The golden frog admitted that he didn't often meet anyone, but, when he did, he always gave them six wishes, so he told them that they could have three wishes each.
Mr. Bear immediately wished that all the other bears in the forest were females. The frog granted his wish. Mr. Rabbit, after thinking for a while, wished for a crash helmet. One appeared immediately, and he placed it on his head.
Mr. Bear was amazed at Mr. Rabbit's wish, but carried on with his second wish. He wished that all the bears in the neighboring forests were females as well, and the frog granted his wish. Mr. Rabbit then wished for a motorcycle. It appeared before him, and he climbed on board and started revving the engine.
Mr. Bear could not believe it and complained that Mr. Rabbit had wasted two wishes that he could have had for himself. Shaking his head, Mr. Bear made his final wish, that all the other bears in the world were females as well, leaving him as the only male bear in the world. The frog replied that it had been done, and they both turned to Mr. Rabbit for his last wish.
Mr. Rabbit revved the engine, thought for a second, then said, 揑 wish that Mr. Bear was gay!?and rode off as fast as he could.
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